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Posts Tagged ‘comedy’


wb7o

If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere.

My first day in New York City. 

I took to the streets, walking to the office, I immediately noticed New Yorkers don’t adhere to the three foot rule. If you get to within three feet of a person, you smile and greet them. I scared me some New Yorkers.

The Empire State Building was lit in green and blue tonight.

It’s up to you New York, New York.

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2 (10)

Don’t look at me, that cow was an overachiever. 

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1 (10)

Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Future, or Past. You tell me?

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10 (14)

Sorry no snappy repartee, Just pretty…

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4 (3)

Damn Gecko.

 

 

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I can’t imagine why a Reindeer Pot Roast recipe is included in my family archives . Was Santa on someone s**t list? Was one of my ancestors going to show Mr. Claus what when you leave a stocking full of oranges instead of candy? I can;t tell you for sure.

But I can give you a jist of the recipe.

Wipe down the roast with LARD, preferably salted pork lard. (You can tell the age of a recipe by the term used to reference fat. This one’s old.)

Roll roast in flour, salt, and pepper.

Fry the roast in more salted pork LARD (1/2 pound) in a “kettle”. (Yeah, this is an old recipe.)

Brown flour in “Kettle”. (Okay, she was confused about kettles, but hey, she could write, so get over it.)

Place roast on rack in bottom of kettle. (Because hey don’t forget the LARD is still in there. Add water, seasonings (not getting too fancy because the only seasoning is one bay leaf) , cover and simmer.

Add carrots, onions, potatoes and turnips. (Haven’t heard that one in a recipe in a long time.)

If you don’t have enough meat for everyone make dumplings.

And so my Foodie Friends, add that one to your cookbook!

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02 (5)

What’s her story?

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3 (5)

Why I oughta…

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Another recipe from the family vault. I’m amazed to find someone write this recipe down, but it’s your gain or loss, whatever.

Think oysters on the half shell but without the oyster. Okay, this may be a little too gourmet for some of you, so bear with me.

To start, you’re going to need cooked rice. Combine the rice with water, Worcestershire, vinegar, sugar, ketchup 

(You know it’s high class when ketchup’s in the ingredients.)

and butter. 

(Because we all know bologna doesn’t contain the fat content we’re looking for.)

Heat all that crap up. (I should write a cookbook with descriptions like that.)

In the meantime heat up fat, yes I said it, FAT in a skillet. (I like it when they just call a spade a spade.)

Brown the bologna. Now you’re getting it. Bologna cups, half shells. 

Fill the bologna cup with rice, top with cheese, and broil.

There you have it. What I like to call – Country Folk Half Shells.

God, I thought fancy bologna was greatness when I was a kid.

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3 (2)

Look see, this is our beach. Don’t make me get the other bouncers. Cause Walrus baby, we will take you on.

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