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Archive for the ‘animals’ Category

I Miss the Sugar

Posted in alcohol, animals, art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, humor, life, Personal, photography, writer, Writing on April 20, 2017| 13 Comments »


What does this picture have to do with my post?

 Nothing, but it’s my blog and I can post it if I want to.

I need to write something funny, but I’m not feeling inspired. I think maybe my blood sugar is too even since I eat mostly vegetables now. I’m missing the sugar highs, I think I was much funnier then. Or maybe I’m missing alcohol, the drinking kind not the rubbing kind.

Someone told me that I could get more traffic on my blog if I wrote about trending topics, but I don’t know how I can fit World War III, polar bears, Earth and border patrol all into the same post. The Earth will be engulfed in World War III if the polar bears aren’t stopped by the border patrol. That was totally spontaneous.

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Poisoned and Lived to Tell the Tale

Posted in animals, entertainment, family, food, health, humor, life, Personal, photography, sister, women, tagged on April 19, 2017| 28 Comments »


(The picture is unrelated, I just liked it.)

I was poisoned (and lived to tell the tale). I can’t help saying the last phrase, they just go together. I thought if you were poisoned and you died. But as I discovered, that’s not necessarily so.

It left my kidneys functioning at 55%. (I have already claimed dibs on my sister’s kidneys. Not that she’s going to wake up in a tub of ice or anything.) I started eating mostly vegetarian and my kidney function has come up to 90%. Still, it has left me with some residual pain.

Though I’ve thought of you and my blog these last several month, I’ve been drained of all energy. Good news, I’m starting to feel more energetic and I am blogging again.

Please be patient. It might be a while before I’m back to blogging everyday. I have missed you all and am looking forward to interacting with you again.

Dee

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Top 10 Things I Said During Christmas

Posted in animals, Christmas, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, Fiction, flash fiction, holiday, humor, life, love, Personal, sarcasm, short story, sister, writer, Writing, tagged , , , , , on December 24, 2016| 31 Comments »


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Some people never grow up and I’m glad I’m one of them. My top 10 list of things I said during Christmas.

10. I don’t know who brought the whoopee cushion, but yes, I did use it.

9. You are not allowed to use my <deodorant, shampoo, eye shadow, moisturizer> without asking because you forgot yours or it smells SO good.

8. My sweater will not be the same after your chest has been in it.

7. Yes, I brought heated sheets and no, they are not for us to share.

6. To my “vegan” sister: We all know you’re a vegan. However, lobster is an animal and it does so count. I don’t care what you read. And I still think serving you the turkey neck was funny and so do our brothers.

5. Leaving my door unlocked was not an invitation for you all to take over my bed and drink my chocolate wine. And I’m the only one who gets to drink out of the bottle.

4. Reading my journal is not an attempt to bring us closer. It was not lying open on the bed. It was hidden in the chest of drawers.

3. I don’t think waving the turkey carcass, butt first in my face brought back nostalgic memories from our childhood.

2. I don’t know who put the ice packs in your beds. To one of my brothers: Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Good one.

1. Sorry the kittens shredded the toilet paper, again. I have a 20 pack hidden in my trunk.

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Simon?

Posted in animals, art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged on October 25, 2016| 3 Comments »


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Simon says stand on your left leg.

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Going North?

Posted in animals, art, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, love, Personal, photography, Random, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged on October 18, 2016| 2 Comments »


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Are we playing following the leader or Simon Says?

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Everyone Loves a Baby

Posted in animals, art, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, love, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing on October 16, 2016| 13 Comments »


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You Look Familiar

Posted in animals, art, books, comedian, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, love, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, writer, Writing on October 15, 2016| 7 Comments »


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Meeting Games

Posted in animals, art, books, comedian, comic, entertainment, fantasy, Fantasy/Scifi, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, love, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on October 12, 2016| 15 Comments »


I have been known to nod off in long meetings in which the topic has little to nothing to do with me. I’ve invented a game to stay awake, the one line game. Here’s a few from yesterday:

I new insanity was pervasive here, I just didn’t realize it was contagious.

Blue reminds me of the ocean, crystal clear skies, calm summer days. I hate blue.

I had under estimated the creature I hunted and Paulo had paid for it with his life.

Moments like this are why I don’t keep chocolate in my desk.

The edge of anything is always a bad place to be.

And one for you to finish –

Somewhere an old brain cell must have fired up again when I remembered <fill in the blank>.

Until the next boring meeting.

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Is the cat away?

Posted in animals, art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, Random, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged on October 11, 2016| 6 Comments »


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Has she put out the bird seed yet?

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You’re Heavier Than You Look

Posted in animals, art, books, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, politics, sarcasm, writer, Writing on October 9, 2016| 8 Comments »


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