Posted in art, comedian, comic, life, love, photography, Uncategorized on September 2, 2016| 22 Comments »
Posted in art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, love, nephew, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, the pistol, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged author, comedian, comedy, family. job, funny, humor, humour, job, laugh, writer, writing on September 2, 2016| 14 Comments »
Some of you may remember my young nephew the Pistol. His one and only Grandpa died. Now the Pistol and one of his cousins Katie are the youngest of their siblings. The other kids are teenagers.
The main service was over and family members were coming forward to relate their stories. The adults went first followed by the teens. No one thought about the five year olds. In awesome Pistol style, my little nephew stood up and loudly announced, “I have something to say.”
The Pistol climbed the steps up front. And he began.
“Grampa won’t be able to give Katie rides on the tractor anymore, because … well … he’s dead. And now I would like to sing God Bless America.” At which point, he began belting it out. The audience rose and joined him.
It was a lovely way to end a funeral. Pistol, you’re awesome
Posted in animals, art, comedian, entertainment, family, humor, life, love, photography, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on August 31, 2016| 1 Comment »
Posted in art, comedian, comic, family, fantasy, Fantasy/Scifi, Fiction, flash fiction, food, humor, life, love, My Writing Updates, Personal, photography, Random, sarcasm, short story, sister, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged author, comedian, comedy, comic, family, funny, humor, job, laugh, life, work, writer, writing on August 30, 2016| 34 Comments »
Every morning my obnoxious alarm goes off. Blinded by daylight, I slap it a couple of times and stumble to the kitchen. I stand in front of the open refrigerator door, drink milk straight from the carton, and grab a hard boiled egg.
I love cold hard boiled eggs so I make them on Sunday afternoon and put them in a container ready for the week. It adds to my mindless routine. I love mindless in the morning.
But one day it was different. Saturday morning, my siblings decided to get together. Early. Really early. They know I don’t do early, especially not on Saturday. Early Saturday in Deidra time means I’ll be 2 hours late. Whatever time you set.
To help me with this, they decided to meet at my house and for my convenience, they let themselves in. They’re really thoughtful that way.
An issue arose during the early morning gathering which has forced me to issue the following warning.
To the person who replaced my boiled egg with a frozen egg,
I’m narrowing the suspect pool. The noose is tightening. Feel my breath on the back of your neck as I close in. In the words of the immortal wicked witch of Oz.
“I will get you and your little dog too.”
Posted in animals, art, comedian, comic, entertainment, fantasy, Fantasy/Scifi, Fiction, flash fiction, food, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on August 29, 2016| 7 Comments »
Cheese should be service room temperature. I learned that is France. I just took the cheese out of the frig, so I’m sitting on it trying to warm it up with the bun power. See, I am a super hero with super buns.
Posted in Uncategorized on August 28, 2016| 21 Comments »
Buttons sat on the open window sill, his green eyes narrow slits. He calculated the amount of force it would take to propel himself through the air to the robins flitting about outside. Never mind the two-story drop.
“Buttons, come away from there,” his mistress sternly called.
He obeyed, begrudgingly.
Mind your own bee’s wax, he thought.
“You don’t want to eat them anyway.”
No, duh, the whole cat of the undead thing.
Katherine’s eyes narrowed.
Buttons pretended to ignore her, closing his eyes. Sometimes he thought she could read his mind. She was unnerving like that and cats are hard to unnerve.
He seemed like any other cat unless you looked too closely. Other than the scraggly fur and an ear that had seen better days, he seemed quite normal. His mistress had resurrected him when she was four. She was the most powerful necromancer in a thousand years, maybe ever. People avoid someone with power like hers.
Posted in art, comedian, comic, humor, life, love, photography, Uncategorized on August 26, 2016| 18 Comments »
Posted in animals, art, comedian, entertainment, family, humor, life, love, photography, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on August 24, 2016| 5 Comments »
Posted in art, comedian, comic, entertainment, humor, life, photography, Uncategorized, tagged funny on August 19, 2016| 12 Comments »
Posted in animals, art, comic, entertainment, family, humor, life, love, mother's day, mothers day, Personal, photography, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on August 17, 2016| 7 Comments »
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