Has she put out the bird seed yet?
Archive for the ‘flash fiction’ Category
Is the cat away?
Posted in animals, art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, Random, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on October 11, 2016| 6 Comments »
You’re Heavier Than You Look
Posted in animals, art, books, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, politics, sarcasm, writer, Writing on October 9, 2016| 8 Comments »
Simon, are you sure about this?
Posted in animals, art, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing on October 8, 2016| 9 Comments »
My Mind’s Eye Needs Glasses
Posted in art, books, chick lit, comedian, comic, entertainment, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, writer, Writing, tagged minds eye on October 6, 2016| 2 Comments »
10 Things I have been known to say to or about my arch-nemesis
Hey, is hateful on a stick here yet?
If we say my arch-nemesis’s name backwards babies cry, mirrors shatter & volcanoes erupt.
I spoke to your people through a ouija board and they’re ok doing it my way.
Will your crows be sitting on my car when I leave today?
I’m afraid her winged monkeys will snatch me away. How did she get out from under that house anyway?
I have to send a document to my arch nemesis for review. She’s in a different time zone, so I’m waiting until it’s after hours in the inner ring of hell.
The demoness is not to be trifled with. I heard she was divorced. I didn’t know you could divorce the devil.
Someone tell the wicked witch I don’t have her ruby slippers.
The devil’s handmaiden is back and in full force. She’s been refreshed by a cup full of hell fire & brimstone.
The guardian of the gates of hell scared the devil so she’s back early from her vacation.
Lessons Learned
Posted in animals, art, children, comedian, comic, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing, tagged animals on October 4, 2016| 8 Comments »
Taco Bell Dog’s Got Nothing On Me
Posted in animals, art, children, comedian, comic, dog, entertainment, family, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, food, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, sarcasm, short story, Uncategorized, writer, Writing on October 2, 2016| 13 Comments »
My Mind’s Eye Needs Glasses
Posted in art, books, comedian, comic, entertainment, fantasy, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, photography, sarcasm, short story, writer, Writing, tagged minds eye on September 29, 2016| 16 Comments »
Top 14 Reasons I hate 8 a.m.
I hate 8 a.m. because
People are stupid at 8am again.
People are smart asses at 8am.
People are grouchy. I know I’m people.
My eyes refuse to focus.
Perky people want me to kill them.
People are too loud.
The light it too loud.
My lung and the air are not speaking to each other yet.
The world hasn’t tilted back on its axis yet from the night before.
It makes me nausaus.
My password doesn’t work right the first time.
It comes way before 10.
I hate driving at 8 am because idiots wreck at 7:30.
I could like an 8 a.m.Ā meeting if it wasn’t for the 8Ā a.m.Ā part.
Barb, the Vegan Zombie
Posted in art, books, chick lit, comedian, comic, entertainment, fantasy, Fantasy/Scifi, Fiction, flash fiction, humor, life, literature, Personal, photography, romance, sarcasm, short story, writer, Writing, tagged fantasy on September 22, 2016| 12 Comments »
Imagine a world where the undead exist and you hope one side or the other will pick you to join them. What if the wrong side picked you?
Barb lay faced down on the pavement. Her warm blood flowing away from her like a river, carrying with it her life. She was helpless to do anything but watch. With a last shuttering gasp, blackness enveloped her.
…
“Hey lady, you okay?”
The smell of vomit and cheap liquor stung her nose. She gagged. Perhaps Barb had cheated death after all. She pulled herself up. The ugly gaping wound was still there. She could clearly see intestines, but there was no blood. Not a drop.
Her heart wasn’t beating. She wasn’t breathing.
“Oh geeze, not undead. Anything but zombie. This is certainly going to put a damper on my sex life. And the whole flesh eating things. I’m a vegetarian for gosh sakes. This isn’t going to work for me,” she yelled at no one in particular.