My sister is mad at me … again.
My niece’s name is the source of several of our conflicts. I told her to pick a name that could not be made fun of, children and aunts can be so cruel. But my sister went with Elizabeth despite my warning.
When she was an infant, Elizabeth thought lizard gizzard the funniest thing ever.
When she was a toddler, I taught her to sing Lizzie Borden. Nothing’s creepier than hearing that sweet toddler voice sing “she gave her mother fifty whacks”.
And now, I received the softest throw for my birthday. It looked like it was made of tiny feathers. My niece asked, “It’s so soft, what’s it made of?”
My sister gave me the evil glare and said, “No.” Like I was a dog or her kid.
Answers ran through my head: the Easter Bunny, the skin of the last unicorn, or the wings of a thousand fairies. There’s the tooth fairy and that was your fairy godmother.
Instead I said, “The petals of the softest, most beautiful flowers in the world. Do you know what they’re called?”
“No.”
“Lizzie, they were named after you.”
Now my sister’s totally ticked. Her daughter won’t respond to Elizabeth any more. Now she’s Lizzie. Next stage, get her to nickname herself “E”, since I’m “D”. On to my niece Georgina.
Auntie’s coming G.
Addendum: I was asked if plucking the wings from fairies hurts them. I’m not sure about that, but it definitely slows them down.
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