I was having dinner with my sister the other night which made me stop and reflect over ten years of technological advancement.

Ten years ago my sister called telling me her mouse didn’t work.

When I said, “Make sure it’s plugged all the way in the back of the computer.”

She said, “Does it have to be plugged in?”

Today that’s bordering on a valid question.

When my sister learned of the internet, she thought there were only five websites Walmart, a grocery store, an auction place, AOL, and some kind of family tree thing.

Last week she said, “I don’t know what twitter and blog (yes, she said just blog) are, but they’re getting on your Facebook somehow.”

I wanted to tell her it was the Facebook Fairy, but I already plucked his wings off. (See previous post)

My sister finally dumped her ten year old computer and left dial up behind. What’s next? Cable?

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Recently, when I was having one of my meltdowns a male, who shall remain nameless, shoved my head in his armpit.

I, of course, began whaling him. Not that it did me much good. I’m 5’2″ and he’s 6’2″.

I asked or maybe screamed a little, “What are you doing?”

He replied, “Calming you down. Male musk has a calming affect on females.”

“Do I look calm?”

“If you would just let biology work.”

“I’m going to let anatomy work if you ever do that again.”

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I’ve released a new blog

My Traveling Panties & Other Stories of Champagne & Cheese Whiz

Available on Amazon for the Kindle

Here’s the promo video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=466iTVXjCAE

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A friend of mine, Sasha Summers, has a new book coming out called Medusa. Which reminded me of a saying my mom use to have, something about “When in Rome do … do … oh yeah, do a Roman.” Until next time, I’ll be listening to Momma. Maybe you should too.

Here’s the Medusa trailor http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90fH7xoZiCo. 

And a blog post by Sasha http://thebookboost.blogspot.com/2012/02/in-love-with-love-with-guest-blogger.html

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I like my lobster like my men – red, hot, and smothered in butter.

Happy

Valentine’s

Day

Dee

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I have an arch nemesis at work. Yes, I have an arch nemesis, no I do not feel lucky.

I dodged a bullet a few days ago. The Demoness stood in front of me flipping through her wedding invitations. A cold chill ran through me, probably the Angel of Death, her buddy, dancing on my grave.

My mind was reeling. I don’t know what you get the Guardian of the Gates of Hell for a wedding present. Can you go with coal and switches? Or should your gift be more traditional, like hellfire and brimstone?

Then she said, “Oh, I forgot I only invited my friends.”

To which I replied, “Wow, guess you only needed one stamp.”

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My nephew, the Pistol is five and in kindergarten. He brings home a folder everyday in which the teacher puts a smiley or frowny face and my sister is required to sign it.

When my sister asked for the folder, the Pistol said, “That folder is filled with lies, written by a liar.”

Of course it was a frowny face and read, the Pistol pulled his pants down and sat on a table.

When questioned further, the Pistol replied, “No, I pulled my pants down, then up and then sat on the table.”

His teacher told my sister not to worry about it. It’ll be better once he’s moved to the gifted program.

What the teacher really meant – “Don’t worry about it. It’ll be better once he’s out of my class.”

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In the golden times, Cain and Naalan, the fallen angel, lived amongst us. I was yet born, but I have heard the old tales of how we roamed freely, known and feared by the children of Abel and Seth. We were beset with betrayal and disease. We lost many of our kind. Knowledge of our existence was relegated to legend. There are some who say we will rise again to claim our place as rulers over the humans. I am Fiona member of the Eliden tribe of Cain.

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After much (not really) voting, Damon and Madison were tied for third place. Fiona came in first. If she is unable to continue her duties for any reason, PJ, the second runner-up will assume her responsibilities.

For any late comers, Fiona is a child of Cain, yes the original and Naalaan (fallen angel). Her hobbies include hunting humans for sport and dinner. She likes long walks on bloody battle fields and exacting her revenge under the moonlight.

Look for Fiona’s first post later this week. (Holy crap, I have no idea how this is going to turn out. Tell me if it gets so painful you want me to stop.)

Sweet dreams or your worst nightmares, you’re choice.

D

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