I stumbled across a picture of my Grandmother when she was young. She was wearing a bra and a man’s tie holding a bottle of whiskey. So what did I learn from this elderly vixen?
I learned to bridge cards when shuffling which was the prerequisite to learning poker. I mastered both of these skills when I was 4. I entered kindergarten not knowing the alphabet, but ready to hustle the rest of the class.
At the much more mature age of 6 I learned to roll cigarettes. Grandma would say, “I’m busy over here, go roll Gramm’s a cigarette.” And I would trot over to the tobacco and papers and roll one up.
But the best thing I learned was Grandma’s dirty songs. I think she just made them up on the fly. When I sang them to my Mom and my Aunts, they would yell “Mother” quite sternly. I never had a great singing voice, so my philosophy was and still is if you can’t sing, go for volume.
Since I’m waxing nostalgic I’ll end with a song from Gramms, an oldie but a goodie –
Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes
I’ll never love pink titties again….
P.S I could also curse like ‘a sailor on leave’ by the time I was 6.
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