It was late one evening or early one morning depending on your perspective. I was finishing the last chapter of a great book (reading, not writing) when I heard a loud bang come from my garage. I could see the garage from another room in my house, so I peered across to see the garage lights on and the door open.
If I was sure of only one thing, it was I always close the garage door. All was silent, so I grabbed my home phone and called wait for it – a friend.
“Are you behind my house by any chance?” I asked.
“No, I’m in Louisville.”
“Holy crap, I think someone’s in my garage.”
“Just go check.”
Another crash. “I’m going to call (wait for it) my sister.”
I called my sister who suggested 911 might be a more appropriate group to get in touch with. I didn’t want to bother 911 in case it turned out to be nothing. But finally (3 minutes later) I decided, What the hey I’d give them a call.
The 911 operator said, “Police are already on the way. Your sister and your friend already called.”
More banging, clanging and mayhem came from the garage. As I crouched behind the kitchen island, I realized how flimsy the door between the garage and the kitchen was.
My cell phone rang. It was my friend, a man as you’ll see from the following conversation. I had him on one phone and the 911 operator on the other.
“Go see if you can see anyone outside the window,” he said.
“Okay,” I said.
“What did he say?” the operator asked. I told her, she said, “NO, stay down.”
“Turn on the outside light,” friend said.
“What did he say?” the operator asked. I told her, she said, “NO, stay where you are.”
“Go listen at the garage door,” friend said.
“What did he say?” the operator asked. I told her, she said, “tell him to shut up.”
After a time of hiding in the dark behind the kitchen island, the 911 operator said, “The police are outside. Do you have a weapon?”
I said, “I have a wire hanger.”
The operator snickered and told the officers that I was armed with a wire hanger. The officers snickered but said I could hang on to the hanger if it made me feel safer.
Yes I in a room full of knives I picked up a wire hanger and was ready to throttle any intruders.
NO MORE WIRE HANGERS. Remind you of anyone?
P.S. I slept with that wire hanger for quit for almost six months.
Deidra Alexander's Blog 