I stumbled across a picture of my Grandmother when she was young. She was wearing a bra and a man’s tie holding a bottle of whiskey. So what did I learn from this elderly vixen?
I learned to bridge cards when shuffling which was the prerequisite to learning poker. I mastered both of these skills when I was 4. I entered kindergarten not knowing the alphabet, but ready to hustle the rest of the class.
At the much more mature age of 6 I learned to roll cigarettes. Grandma would say, “I’m busy over here, go roll Gramm’s a cigarette.” And I would trot over to the tobacco and papers and roll one up.
But the best thing I learned was Grandma’s dirty songs. I think she just made them up on the fly. When I sang them to my Mom and my Aunts, they would yell “Mother” quite sternly. I never had a great singing voice, so my philosophy was and still is if you can’t sing, go for volume.
Since I’m waxing nostalgic I’ll end with a song from Gramms, an oldie but a goodie –
Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes
I’ll never love pink titties again….
P.S I could also curse like ‘a sailor on leave’ by the time I was 6.
What a truly wonderful set of skills your grammy passed on to you! I am more than a little jealous…
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So umm, what are the rest of the lyrics?
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Oh, Gramm. I LIKE YOU. You’re lots of fun.
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That was so funny! Your grandma sounds awesome!! Pink titties?? What was gram’s philosophy on that?? HaHa!
~~~Felicia
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True life skills!
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Yes, your Gramm was a treat! What fun you must’ve had with her…great memories. ๐
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she sounds like a wonderful person, you’re lucky to have had her in your life
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Haha…”…if you canโt sing, go for volume.” I love that! Thank you so much for sharing.
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My grandmother told the BEST jokes, unlike my mother who always ruins the punch lines, I loved it when she called me to share a quick joke. I would have totally dug your grandma too, she sounds like fun!
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