Is That New Math?



duck tape glue white paint

drunk driving on company time

I think we hit a bump back there.

bazarre world

I can always tell when I haven’t taken my medication.

A voice in my head whispers, “If you can hear me, you haven’t taken your meds today.”


don't mess with mother nature

Don’t mess with mother nature.

10 Things I have been known to say to or about my arch-nemesis


Hey, is hateful on a stick here yet?

If we say my arch-nemesis’s name backwards babies cry, mirrors shatter & volcanoes erupt.

I spoke to your people through a ouija board and they’re ok doing it my way.

Will your crows be sitting on my car when I leave today?

I’m afraid her winged monkeys will snatch me away. How did she get out from under that house anyway?

I have to send a document to my arch nemesis for review. She’s in a different time zone, so I’m waiting until it’s after hours in the inner ring of hell.

The demoness is not to be trifled with. I heard she was divorced. I didn’t know you could divorce the devil.

Someone tell the wicked witch I don’t have her ruby slippers.

The devil’s handmaiden is back and in full force. She’s been refreshed by a cup full of hell fire & brimstone.

The guardian of the gates of hell scared the devil so she’s back early from her vacation.

dont mess with city hall

Don’t mess with city hall.


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